I am 25, done studying literature but still venting spleen.


43 thoughts on “About

  1. Iblees. Aren’t you like, going to introduce yourself here.

  2. Haseeb Asif says:

    I will, as soon as I figure out how! The internet and I rarely get along you see. I pressed one wrong button and now my blog looks like graffiti on pavement.

    Edit: Done! That was suspiciously easy. Normally it’s a miracle if I log into my computer without managing to burn the house down.

  3. Gawd says:

    what did you do to Zardari ?

  4. Shazia Nawaz says:

    This is where you write your introduction. What do you do?
    Where do you live?
    Leave Pakistan immediately.
    You are a very good writer though.

    • Haseeb Asif says:

      I do nothing and I live at home. Mostly. Well, it’s always someone’s home isn’t it? I am not a good writer, I don’t even like the English language. I can hardly speak it, I mostly converse in Punjabi. Now that’s my language. It’s the language I think in, feel in, swear in; you can always tell someone’s language by their swearing. Nothing is more instinctive.

      Unfortunately I can not write in Punjabi. I don’t think anyone in this country can, anymore.

      • I agree with the swearing language bit. How true.

        And I wish I was studying literature 😦 I envy you for doing so. And you Are a good writer, or at least in the posts I have read.

  5. Ahmed Asif says:


    What’s your email? I can share some stuff with you if you like.

  6. mahlaqa says:

    ur beard-ed and mustache-ed pic is definitely an innovation 🙂

    • Haseeb Asif says:

      Well that’s me, satan, the great innovator. I invented lying after all, what would humanity do without it? god is a moral absolutist who would have you being honest all the time.

      try walking around telling people they’re fat, ugly or stupid. see where it gets you. now imagine if everyone told the truth.

  7. mahlaqa says:

    well then if thats the criterion ppl do that all the time right in their faces that how so we dont like u 🙂 enf to be God’s good men…. NOOOOOO

  8. venting spleen…BRILLIAAANT!

    • Haseeb Asif says:

      venting spleen is a vicious circle. the more you vent, the more you have…er, to vent…some more, it’s like using a towel while sitting under a waterfall…of horse urine. yeah i think i’ve explained it well with that.

  9. Shivam Vij says:

    write punjabi in roman script?

    • Haseeb Asif says:

      mein likh te lavan per mere kolun aap vi na parni howe, okha kam hega, ais baqwas zabaan ich punjabi samajhna. mein te khaaskar gurmukhi sikhi si punjabi likhan parhan aaste, oh vi pul gayi ai, haye.

      • Shivam Vij says:

        o ji punjabi is not muskil to understand at all. app likho te mein sikhanga! aur ye gurmukhi ke khwab chor de ji, gurudware di zaban ae si. urdu-punjabi-english-farsi-german sab mix karo si khuaf kis da hain? all the world’s successfull languages have been, and are, mongrel languages. the search for purity is futile

  10. Raza Rumi says:

    Great stuff on this blog: delightful discovery thanks to twitter 🙂

  11. Samar says:

    My, My, My!!!
    Just when I start to think that I have seen enough to get shocked by anything else, some Haseeb, nay, Iblees, shatters my newfound confidence.. Why my firend, why?
    Meanwhile, loved your ‘history’ of Pakistan. Remembered Kishwar Naheed’s autobiography.. “ki hamare bachche rashk karenge jab wo janenge ki Pakistan me Azadiyan bhee theen..aur ‘hydrogen aur oxygen ke milne se pani nahi, khuda ke huqm se pani banta hai’.

    Can’t wait for more from you..

    P.S. I have always found myself on the side of Iblees..

  12. mian faizan says:

    you are funny mr iblees very funny funny man indeed but alot of things you say are kufar and ur wajib ul qatal just thought id let you know

  13. Taha Khan says:

    love mian faizan comment…lolzzzz

  14. Anonymous says:

    Beautiful, Iblees. Years and muscles to your pen.



  15. KisyaNuKi says:

    Rabb da shuker eh… akhir kaar shetaan mil hi geya!

  16. Vipasha says:

    I recently read your article in the Outlook magazine,’Bhaijaan,show it to me under the sheets’ and I really rejoiced the ‘ogling’ thing 😉 Happy writing man!!!!!

  17. Wolfgang says:

    Everyone loves what you guys tend to be up too. This sort of clever work and coverage!
    Keep up the terrific works guys I’ve included you guys to blogroll.

  18. Atique Miah says:

    You’re a very good writer. But I feel sorry for you that you have not had the tawfeeq to understand the Qur’an. You say you learnt to read fluently a book, some passages, some words but of which you had no idea of the meaning. What has stopped you from finding out the meaning of these beautiful words. I’m sure you can pick up a translation in Punjabi or even in English…yes maybe just maybe they do English translations of this here Qur’an.. Or would you prefer to call it the Koran? It seems that you have knowledge but you just lack the understanding. You ask many pertinent questions but fail to grasp that all of your answers can be found within the Qur’an. If only there was a way of understanding what those Arabic words mean! Oh my frustrations know no bounds!

    Just Google it and you’ll find me
    I pray that you find the answers that you search

  19. shah says:

    حضرت عمر رضی الله تعالی عنه

  20. shah says:

    حضرت عمر فاروق رضی الله تعالی عنه

  21. shah says:

    شیطان تم اپنا انجام جان جا تیرا دجال کا موت میرا نسل جوان مسلمانان مهدی هاشمی اور مریم کا بچا کرتا هوگا خود اپنا انجام یاد کرا کر

  22. shah says:

    شیطان تو اور دجال کو بنایا بهی میرا رب وه جب
    اس وقت کسی لمه اسکی مرضی نم کو ختم کر فنا کر سکتا

  23. shah says:

    اپنا انجام یاد کرا کر جو برحق هوگا تو صور کا انتظار کر فنا هوگا پورا سمندر سمیت تو اپنا شیطان مردود دجال مردود

  24. shah says:

    ملک مخدوم سید محمد جعفر شاه خان صاحبزاده حسن پیر گنج بخش غازی

  25. shah says:

    ملک مخدوم سید محمد جعفر شاه خان صاحبزاده حسن پیر گنج بخش غازی ابدال

  26. shah says:

    پیر گنج بخش غازی ابدال

  27. very funny…and refreshing. thank goodness you aren’t in india. you’d be jailed by now since some group or the other would be offended by something or the other you wrote/write/intend to write….you are lucky to be where you are….oh, wait!

  28. Anonymous says:

    Hi, there. Any chance I could have your email address please? I wanted to contact you regarding a recent article you wrote. Thanks!

  29. TK says:

    Hi Haseeb, Just read your Herald article on Pakistan’s gated communities. Brilliant work. I’m a scholar (and occasional activist) and am interested in supporting just this kind of research. Let me know your email address if you’d like to collaborate in the future. (don’t have a blog but created a wordpress account because there seemed to be no other way to reach you) Keep up the good work!

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